The Gift of Unstructured, Undistracted Moments

I just moved from the city to a farm.  Yes, a literal farm.  

Life was pretty crazy in the weeks leading up to the move.  There were so many decisions to make and I changed my mind multiple times on multiple things.  My apologies if you happened to be on the receiving end of my oscillations.  

I got a little bit emotional saying goodbye to some of my clients.   Most of the time I was in my warrior energy - my “Get It Done” mode.  

One of the many things to get done was all my annual medical appointments.  After seeing the chiropractor one last time, I was walking back to my office when I passed by a Catholic Church.  On a whim, I decided to go inside.

I am not Catholic, but I appreciate that most Catholic Churches are open during the week so that people can come and go as needed.  Sometimes sitting in a pew looking up at the altar and the stained glass windows feels like a formal meeting with God.  It feels more deliberate and less distracted than my usual routine with God.  

During this visit, I started to cry almost as soon as I sat in the pew.  I didn’t have any words or thoughts to go with the tears.  Something visceral just needed expression.  Maybe it was the exhaustion from packing up my life and business.  Maybe it was grief from all the failures I experienced in the city.  Maybe it was fear about what the new life will actually require of me.  I honestly don’t know.  

The important thing is that God knows what those tears conveyed and I trust that whatever happened in the pew is exactly what I needed.  As the tears passed, I found that I settled into a calm state. I let myself experience being in that the space, hearing the muted noises of people around me, smelling the incense, feeling the wood beneath my body.  

One of my clients periodically sends me links to articles he thinks I might find interesting.  The most recent one was about meditation.  The gist of the article was that meditation literally changes your brain waves.  Even more surprising, the increase in theta brain waves lasts beyond the end of the meditation.

Theta are the frequency of deep relaxation, but they also play a huge role in creativity by helping the conscious and unconscious minds interact.  Theta waves are also connected with emotional access and healing.  They can even help you focus because you have better access to your memories.  If you tend toward a hyper-focus on tasks, data, and rules, meditation can help slow your thoughts.  With slower thoughts, anxiety dissipates as connections with emotion, intuition, and spiritual guidance increase.

If you have ADHD, you probably have an excess of theta waves.  This may seem counterintuitive, but the ADHD brain lives in a slower brain wave state.  This makes attention difficult because the mind is wandering between the conscious and unconscious.  Some people engage in hyperactivity as a way to jot their brain into a more attentive state.

Despite the excess of theta waves, meditation is very helpful to ADHD brains also.   The ADHD brain often gets stuck in anxiety/restless/agitation or in lethargy and day-dreaming.  Meditation increases alpha waves in ADHD people.  Alpha waves are connected with internal focus.  This means that you become more aware of your internal processes, less reactive and impulsive, less emotionally overwhelmed.  Meditation also helps the ADHD brain tune out external distractions and shift more easily between brain states.  Wouldn’t it be nice just start a project without working hard to get your brain revved up?

There are many different ways to meditate.  Don’t feel like it won’t work for you because you can’t empty your mind.  That’s actually not a requirement for the process.  Your mind will wander to the past or the future, or why that person has such a weird sounding sneeze.   The point of meditation is to gently teach your mind to come back to the current moment.  

I personally prefer immersive experiences:

• Sitting on a church pew and looking at the light coming through stained glass

• Listening (and sometimes humming) to a calming song

• Sitting on a rock while watching and listening to water as it flows down a creek

My suggestion for you today is to just give yourself a little bit of time to just be still, without agenda, without trying to find words.  

Notice your feelings, notice your breath, notice what your five senses are telling you. 

Be curious.

Be compassionate with yourself.  

Be still 

…and your nervous system will follow.